An essay to women about boys.

*holds breath*

This week I stood on stage in front of thousands of people and delicately approached the topic of men from a place of empathy. In the name of progress and unity. Most people were on board, but some were fucking PISSED.

I have a lot to say about it, and want to gather my thoughts in the next few days. In the mean time, I wanted to send you this old speech I wrote, that not a lot of people have seen, that started me on this journey of seeking the cause of misogyny rather than hyper-focusing on the symptoms.

Ok.

This is called, “Tell Him.”

Bloody hell, where do I start?

I suppose when writing something about feminism, I can’t help but feel that it’s not only us who should be learning and growing, being armed with motivation and understanding.

I think so many women have the power to infiltrate misogyny in their own homes. It starts by never taking for granted how poisonous society can be to the male psyche, and protecting boys from the onslaught of misinformation everywhere. They are bombarded with dangerous imagery, song lyrics, peer pressure and often quite damaging/violent/entirely-intimacy-free pornography, all of which is sold to them as a glamorous and realistic norm. Men are throttled with toxic masculinity and given made up ideals that they are forced to subscribe to. They are belittled and rejected when they show signs of sensitivity. They are mocked and insulted when they show their pain or “care too much”. Even the fact that music that is kind to women or talks about feelings, is considered “wet” or labelled “sad boy music.” It’s such a potent, rotten marinade that boys grow up soaked in.
Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t some “poor boys” appeal. It’s just that in my opinion, it’s as if men are recruited young and brainwashed, in order to be indoctrinated and manipulated into an oppressive patriarchal institution. This is a call to arms for the women who have boys growing up in their houses…

We have a lot of work to undo…